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Science! This 3D Printer Makes Elaborate Recipes

Experts say its only a matter of time before 3D printers become as ubiquitous as the smartphone or at least the sewing machine. What are they? These tech marvels are just like regular printers, but handle 3D space. That means any gadget your heart desires can be whipped up in a jiffy. This now also pertains to food.

Introducing the Foodini, a 3D printer for the kitchen. You load the printer with sci-fi sounding “food capsules” and then tell it what recipe to make. Pretty soon you’ll be chowing down on said recipe. It seems to excel at repetitive tasks like making pasta and beef patties. Finally, even those of us who suck at cooking can have a sous chef to boss around the kitchen.

The Foodini will actually be on store shelves next year, and not in the year 2058 as the tech would suggest. Upon launch, the unit will cost around $1,300. In the meantime, you can always just buy pre-made dinners and pretend a robot printer made them.

This Burger Features an Actual Deep-Fried Beer Patty

Burgers and beer. These two compatriots have shared a special relationship since the dawn of hops. If you are gorging on an awesome cheeseburger, you are gonna want a beer to sit along side it. Would you, though, want that beer deep-fried and on top of it?

Philadelphia’s PYT is assuming you do. They’ve just unveiled something they call the “Beerger.” This burger-beer hybrid starts simple enough, with a bun, pickles and a cheeseburger. However, the beef is then topped with a deep-fried patty of Pabst Blue Ribbon. Really. The beer is wrapped in wontons and crushed pretzels and then fried. Accordingly, you have to be over 21 to even order this thing.

This alcoholic concoction will only be available for a limited time, so if you are sick of swallowing beer without having to chew it, head on over to Philadelphia.

Here’s an Ultra-Gourmet TV Dinner That Costs $500

It used to be that TV dinners were all the rage. Those flat, semi-edible trays of Salisbury steak and weird brownie were in every freezer across this great land of ours. Everyone still noshes in front of a TV. That much hasn’t changed. However, the once ubiquitous TV dinner has fallen by the way side. One man seeks to bring it back, by way of Cornish lobster and expensive champagne.

UK Chef Charlie Bigham has designed a new kind of TV dinner which he calls a “luxury meal.” It still comes on a tray. It’s still meant to be eaten in front of a television. It, however, does not contain hot apple goo and rubber chicken. His meal contains the aforementioned Cornish lobster, fish poached in Dom Perignon champagne, gold (really,) caviar, truffles and oysters. What, no diamond-encrusted dingo birds?

All of this gourmet grub comes at a price, though. You can order one of these fancy dinners for around — wait for it — five hundred bucks. Yowza!

This French Cafe Charges Double if You Aren’t Polite

Manners are important. Holding doors open for people, saying your pleases and thank yous, refraining from eating your friend’s French fries. These are the hallmarks of a polite society. However, as anyone who has stood in a line can attest to, politeness is not always a given. This French bistro, though, gives one heck of an incentive to remain civilized.

La Petite Syrah in Nice, France has instituted a new policy. If you aren’t polite, your coffee and treats cost twice as much. The menu features a tiered format that offers different prices depending on how nice you are to the staff. Saying “please” and “thank you” and being generally amiable nets you the biggest reward. Being a major turd, however, will empty your wallet.

The cafe’s owner says that the new policy has made a noticeable difference in customer interactions, with people smiling more and being altogether nicer. Don’t expect this idea to travel across the pond, though. Being impolite is a God given American right.

Inventors of Cronut Now Have a Breakfast Cereal

One of the biggest food stories of 2013 has got to be the not-so-humble Cronut. This donut/croissant hybrid took New York City, and the world, by storm. The creator of said über pastry is NYC’s Dominique Ansel Bakery. This bakery is back with another invention, this time tackling the strange world of breakfast cereal.

They are calling it Christmas Morning Cereal, although it features an auspicious lack of discarded wrapping paper and crushed dreams. The base of the cereal is clusters of puffed rice paired with Valrhona Caramelia chocolate. There’s also a marshmallow component in the form of smoked cinnamon flavored meringue puffs. Finally, the cereal features spiced hazelnut brittle for crunch.

This cereal features some fancy ingredients and your wallet will be tapped accordingly. A box of this stuff will set you back fifteen bucks. You can place a preorder on the bakery’s website now.

Now You Can Have Ice Cream Delivered to Your Door

The signs of winter are everywhere. Fake Christmas trees are making their yearly descent from attics. Men dressed as Santa Claus are making their yearly descent into bottles of peppermint schnapps. Ice cream is, uh, showing up on doorsteps. Wait a minute. Ice cream is showing up on doorsteps?

It’s true. An NYC-based company called Milkmade makes the ice cream and then they deliver the ice cream. It’s a monthly subscription service, kind of like the DVD portion of Netflix only with approximately ten times the calories and fat. It costs you thirty bucks a month, which will net you two creamy pints of the good stuff. That’s pretty expensive but, hey, you only live once. Spend it inside, gorging on entire pints of ice cream.

Right now the service is only available in New York City, but the company has started a “Lickstarter” to raise money to take this thing to the rest of the country.

This Restaurant Has Monkeys on the Waitstaff

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They say monkeys are our closest ancestor, so why not put those freeloaders to work? Bananas aren’t free, after all. With that in mind, here is a restaurant that employs monkeys as part of their valued waitstaff.

North of Tokyo, in the Japanese city of Utsunomiya, lies a simple sake-house called Kayabukiya Tavern. Sure, they have a human waitstaff, but they also have two macaque monkeys. One takes drink orders and delivers them to the bar and the other hands out hot towels to customers. The restaurant’s owner says that he is currently training more monkeys to take over more available waitstaff positions. Is this how that whole primate apocalypse starts?

Burger King Japan Starts Selling Giant Turkey Legs

Sure, the fast food restaurants in Japan may look identical to those found in America, but beneath the familiar colors and bespectacled Southern gentlemen lies a secret. The menus often have oddball items that will never, ever make it across the pond. Burger King Japan is especially guilty of this.

BKJ has just unveiled something not very burger-like but absolutely king-like: a gigantic turkey leg. The legs are smoked with a blend of oak and beech chips and come in “King’s Turkey Party Sets” which is sort of a fancy way of saying combo meal. Oh those royals and their unnecessary word choices.

If you live in Japan, you can put down a reservation (really) for some legs now.

Microsoft Weirdly Announces Bra That Helps With Stress Eating

Do you find yourself overeating due to the daily stressors of modern life? Are you obsessed with the latest and greatest developments in technology? Are you a woman and don’t mind being pandered to? Microsoft’s new “smartbra” is for you.

Microsoft has announced they are creating a bra that is outfitted with physiological sensors that monitor subtle changes in heart rate that tend to be associated with negative emotional states. The results? The bra will let you know when you are eating not out of a need for sustenance, but because you are anxious, depressed or bored. Being as how it’s being made by Bill Gates and company, one can only hope it comes with a free Weezer video or an anthropomorphic paperclip dude.

But wait a minute. Guys stress eat too! Isn’t there a way to throw some of these snazzy microchips into their underwear? Apparantly not. According to the designers, underwear is simply too far from the heart to be of use in this scenario. Oh well. Let’s order fourteen pizzas.

New York City Now Boasts World’s Largest Gingerbread Village

First there was the gingerbread house and it was fine, if your name wasn’t Gretel. Next came the gingerbread cul-de-sac. It offered a decent amount of cookie goodness, but it wasn’t going to feed an entire football team. Now, however, there are entire gingerbread villages, each unique in its own edible splendor. Some of these villages are downright enormous, with a recently constructed New York City iteration being named world’s largest.

The gingerbread wonder was made by New York Chef Jon Lovitch and it clocks in at an amazing 1.5 tons of cookie. The village boasts several to-scale blocks, over sixty trees and an underground subway station. Every bit of it is edible, even though some pieces are older than others (it’s been under construction for almost a year.)

If you have a hankering to see this village with your eyes and your mouth, it will be on display until January 12th at the New York Hall of Science in Queens. Each visitor gets a piece to take home. If you don’t mind risking a broken tooth, take a bite!